Despair-Compare Shutdown

It's so hard not to offer support to someone who's grieving in the form of a comparison to highlight the "positive" HOWEVER they really need their grief to be heard first. So instead of offering the reasons they shouldn't be feeling so awful, offer your recognition of their pain.

Some things that can be helpful to say:

I can't imagine what this is like for you. Please tell me.

I sometimes don't know what to say but this seems so hard right now and I really care about you.

I would like to bring you some groceries on Tuesday afternoon, would that be okay?

Be specific about offering helping rather than telling them to call you when they need something ('cause they won't call)

Grief is hard to listen to but it means so much to the person who feels heard and seen.

JULY 3, 2020